THE LATE Tryal and Conviction OF Count TARIFF.

THE whole Nation is at pre⯑ſent very inquiſitive after the Proceedings in the Cauſe of Goodman Fact, Plaintiff, and Count Tariff, Defendant; as it was Tried on the 17th of June, in the Thirteenth Year of Her Majeſty's Reign, and in the Year of the Lord 1713. I [1] [...] [2] ſhall therefore give my Countrymen a ſhort and faithful Account of that whole Matter. And in order to it, muſt in the firſt Place premiſe ſome Particulars relating to the Perſon and Character of the ſaid Plaintiff Good⯑man Fact.

Goodman Fact is allowed by eve⯑ry Body to be a plain-ſpoken Per⯑ſon, and a Man of very few Words. Tropes and Figures are his Averſion. He affirms every Thing roundly, without any Art, Rhetorick, or Cir⯑cumlocution. He is a declared Ene⯑my to all Kinds of Ceremony and Complaiſance. He flatters no Body. Yet ſo great is his natural Eloquence, that he cuts down the fineſt Orator, and deſtroys the beſt-contrived Argu⯑ment, as ſoon as ever he gets himſelf to be heard. He never applies to the Paſſions or Prejudices of his Au⯑dience: When they liſten with At⯑tention [3] and honeſt Minds, he never fails of carrying his Point. He ap⯑pear'd in a Suit of Engliſh Broad-Cloath, very Plain, but Rich. Every thing he wore was ſubſtantial, honeſt, home-ſpun Ware. His Cane indeed came from the Eaſt-Indies, and two or three little Superfluities from Turkey, and other Parts. It is ſaid that he encouraged himſelf with a Bottle of Neat Port, before he ap⯑pear'd at the Tryal. He was Huz⯑za'd into the Court by ſeveral Thou⯑ſands of Weavers, Clothiers, Fullers, Dyers, Packers, Calenders, Setters, Silk-men, Spinners, Dreſſers, Whit⯑ſters, Winders, Mercers, Throwſters, Sugar-Bakers, Diſtillers, Drapers, Hoſiers, Planters, Merchants, and Fiſhermen; who all unanimouſly de⯑clared that they cou'd not live above Two Months longer, if their Friend Fact did not gain his Cauſe.

[4] Every Body was over-joy'd to hear that the Good Man was come to Town. He no ſooner made his Ap⯑pearance in Court, but ſeveral of his Friends fell a weeping at the Sight of him: For indeed he had not been ſeen there ſome Years before.

The Charge he exhibited againſt Count Tariff was drawn up in the following Articles.

1. That the ſaid Count had given in falſe and fraudulent Reports in the Name of the Plaintiff.

2. That the ſaid Count had tam⯑per'd with the ſaid Plaintiff, and made Uſe of many indirect Me⯑thods to bring him over to his Party.

[5] 3. That the ſaid Count had wil⯑fully and knowingly traduced the ſaid Plaintiff, having miſrepreſented him in many cunningly-deviſed Speeches, as a Perſon in the French In⯑tereſt.

4. That the ſaid Count had aver⯑red in the Preſence of above Five hundred Perſons, that he had heard the Plaintiff ſpeak in Derogation of the Portugueſe, Spaniards, Italians, Hollanders, and others; who were the Perſons whom the ſaid Plaintiff had always favoured in his Diſ⯑courſe, and whom he ſhould always continue to Favour.

5. That the ſaid Count had given a very diſadvantageous Relation of Three Great Farms, which had long flouriſhed under the Care and Su⯑perintendency of the Plaintiff.

[6] 6. That he would have obliged the Owners of the ſaid Farms to buy up many Commodities which grew upon their own Lands. That he would have taken away the Labour from the Tenants, and put it into the Hands of Strangers. That he wou'd have leſſen'd and deſtroy'd the Produce of the ſaid Farms.

That by theſe and many other wicked Devices he wou'd have ſtar⯑ved many honeſt Day-Labourers; have impoveriſh'd the Owner, and have fill'd his Farms with Beggars, &c.

7. That the ſaid Count had either Sunk or Miſlaid ſeveral Books, Pa⯑pers, and Receipts, by which the Plaintiff might ſooner have found Means to vindicate himſelf from [7] ſuch Calumnies, Aſperſions, and Miſ⯑repreſentations.

In all theſe Particulars Goodman Fact was very Short but Pithy: For as I ſaid before, he was a plain home-ſpun Man. His Yea was Yea, and his Nay, Nay. He had further ſo much of the Quaker in him, that he never ſwore, but his Affirmation was as Valid as another's Oath.

It was obſerved that Count Ta⯑riff endeavour'd to brow-beat the Plaintiff all the while he was ſpeak⯑ing: But though he was not ſo Im⯑pudent as the Count, he was every whit as Sturdy; and when it came to the Count's Turn to ſpeak, Old Fact ſo ſtared him in the Face, after his plain, down-right Way, that the Count was very often ſtruck Dumb, [8] and forced to hold his Tongue, in the middle of his Diſcourſe.

More Witneſſes appeared on this Occaſion to atteſt Goodman Fact's Veracity than ever were ſeen in a Court of Juſtice. His Cauſe was pleaded by the Ableſt Men in the Kingdom; among whom was a Gen⯑tleman of Suffolk who did him Signal Service.

Count Tariff appeared juſt the Reverſe of Goodman Fact. He was dreſs'd in a Fine Brocade Waſtcoat, curiouſly Embroider'd with Flower-de-Luces. He wore alſo a broad-brimm'd Hat, a Shoul⯑der-Knot, and a Pair of Silver⯑clock'd Stockins. His Speeches were accompanied with much Ge⯑ſture and Grimace. He abounded in empty Phraſes, ſuperficial Flou⯑riſhes, [9] violent Aſſertions, and fee⯑ble Proofs. To be brief, he had all the French Aſſurance, Cun⯑ning, and Volubility of Tongue; and wou'd moſt certainly have carried his Cauſe, had he dealt with any one Antagoniſt in the World beſides Goodman Fact.

The Count being call'd upon to Anſwer to the Charge which had been made againſt him, did it after a Manner peculiar to the Family of the Tariffs, viz. by Railing and calling Names.

He in the Firſt Place accuſed his Adverſary of Scandalum magnatum, and of ſpeaking againſt his Superi⯑ors with Saucineſs and Contempt. As the Plain Good Man was not of a Make to have any Friends at Court, he was a little ſtartled at this Accu⯑ſation, till at length he made it ap⯑pear, [10] that it was impoſſible for any of his Family to be either Saucy or Cringing; for that their Character was above all others in the World, to do what was required of them by the Court, that is, TO SPEAK THE TRUTH AND NOTHING BUT THE TRUTH.

The Count in the next Place aſſu⯑red the Court, that his Antagoniſt has taken upon him a wrong Name, ha⯑ving curtail'd it of Two or Three Letters; for that in Reality his Name was not FACT but FACTION. The Count was ſo pleaſed with this Con⯑ceit, that for an Hour together he re⯑peated it in every Sentence; calling his Antagoniſt's Aſſertions, the Re⯑ports of Faction; his Friends, the Sons of Faction; the Teſtimonies of his Witneſſes, the Dictates of Faction: Nay, with ſuch a Degree of Impu⯑dence did he puſh this Matter, that [11] when he heard the Cries of above a Million of People begging for their Bread, He termed the Prayers and Importunities of ſuch a ſtarving Mul⯑titude the CLAMOURS OF FACTION.

As ſoon as the Count was driven out of this Device, he affirmed round⯑ly in the Court that FACT was not an Engliſhman by Birth, but that he was of Dutch Extraction, and born in Holland. In conſequence of this Aſſertion he began to rally the poor Plaintiff, under the Title of MYN HEER VAN FACT; which took pret⯑ty well with the Simpletons of his Party, but the Men of Senſe did not think the Jeſt worth all their Lands and Tenements.

When the Count had finiſhed his Speech, he deſired leave to call in his Witneſſes, which was granted: When [12] immediately there came to the Bar a Man with a Hat drawn over his Eyes in ſuch a manner that it was impoſſi⯑ble to ſee his Face. He ſpoke in the Spirit, nay in the very Language of the Count, repeated his Arguments, and confirmed his Aſſertions. Being ask'd his Name? He ſaid the World called him MERCATOR: But as for his true Name, his Age, his Lineage, his Religion, his Place of Abode, they were Particulars, which for cer⯑tain Reaſons he was obliged to con⯑ceal. The Court found him ſuch a Falſe, Shuffling, Prevaricating Raſ⯑cal, that they ſet him aſide as a Perſon unqualify'd to give his Te⯑ſtimony in a Court of Juſtice; advi⯑ſing him at the ſame time, as he tender'd his Ears, to forbear utter⯑ing ſuch notorious Falſhoods as he had then Publiſhed. The Witneſs however perſiſted in his Contumacy, telling them he was very ſorry to [13] find, that notwithſtanding what he had ſaid, they were reſolved to be as arrant Fools as all their Forefathers had been for a Hundred Years be⯑fore them.

There came up another Witneſs, who ſpoke much to the Reputation of Count Tariff. This was a Tall, Black, Bluſtering Perſon, dreſſed in a Spaniſh Habit, with a Plume of Feathers on his Head, a Golillio about his Neck, and a long Toledo ſticking out by his Side: His Gar⯑ments were ſo cover'd with Tinſel and Spangles, that at a diſtance he ſeem'd to be made up of Silver and Gold. He call'd himſelf DON ASSIENTO, and mentioned ſeve⯑ral Nations that had ſought his Friendſhip; but declared that he had been gained over by the Count; and that he was come into theſe Parts [14] to enrich every one that heard him. The Court was at firſt very well pleaſed with his Figure, and the Promiſes he made them; but upon Examination found him a True Spa⯑niard: Nothing but Show and Beg⯑gary. For it was fully proved, that notwithſtanding the Boaſts and Ap⯑pearance which he made, he was not worth a Groat: Nay, that upon caſt⯑ing up his Annual Expences, with the Debts and Incumbrances which lay upon his Eſtate, he was worſe than Nothing.

There appear'd another Witneſs in favour of the Count, who ſpoke with ſo much Violence and Warmth, that the Court begun to liſten to him ve⯑ry attentively; till upon hearing his Name they found he was a notorious Knight of the Poſt, being kept in Pay, to give his Teſtimony on all [15] Occaſions where it was wanted. This was the EXAMINER; A Perſon who had abuſed almoſt every Man in England, that deſerved well of his Country. He called Goodman Fact a Lyar, a Seditious Perſon, a Tray⯑tor, and a Rebel; and indeed ſo much incens'd the Honeſt Man, that he would certainly have knock'd him down if he could have come at him. It was allowed by every Body, that ſo foul-mouth'd a Witneſs never ap⯑peared in any Cauſe. Seeing ſeveral Perſons of great Eminence, who had maintained the Cauſe of Goodman Fact, he called them Ideots, Block⯑heads, Villains, Knaves, Infidels, Atheiſts, Apoſtates, Fiends, and De⯑vils: Never did Man ſhow ſo much Eloquence in Ribaldry. The Court was at length ſo juſtly provok'd with this Fellow's Behaviour, who ſpared no Age, nor Sex, nor Profeſſion, which had ſhown any Friendſhip or [16] Inclination for the Plaintiff, that ſe⯑veral began to Whiſper to one a⯑nother, it was high time to bring him to Puniſhment. But the Wit⯑neſs over-hearing the Word Pillory repeated twice or thrice, ſlunk away privately, and hid himſelf among the People.

After a full Hearing on both Sides, Count Tariff was Caſt, and Goodman Fact got his Cauſe; but the Court ſitting late, did not think it fit at that time to give him Coſts, or indeed, to enter into that Mat⯑ter. The Honeſt Man immediate⯑ly retired, after having aſſured his Friends, That at any time when the Count ſhou'd appear on the like Occaſion, he would undertake their Defence, and come to their Aſſi⯑ſtance, if they would be at the Pains to find him out.

[17] It is incredible, how general a Joy Goodman Fact's Succeſs crea⯑ted in the City of London; there was nothing to be ſeen or heard the next Day, but ſhaking of Hands, Congratulations, Reflections on the Danger they had eſcap'd; and Gra⯑titude to thoſe who had delivered them from it.

The Night concluded with Balls, Bonfires, Ringing of Bells, and the like Publick Demonſtrations of Joy.