[]

PEEPING TOM, OF COVENTRY.

A COMIC OPERA.

AS IT IS PERFORMED AT THE THEATRE-ROYAL, SMOCK-ALLEY

BY JOHN O'KEEFE; Eſq

[...]UB [...]

PRINTED BY JOHN SMITH, CASTLE STREET

MDCCLXXXV.

[P [...]d B [...]ſh Sixpence]

Dramatis Perſonae.

[]
MEN.
  • Tom,—Mr. RYDER,
  • Mayor,—Mr. O'REILLY,
  • Harold,—Mr. WOOD,
  • Crazy,—Mr. BAKER,
  • [...],—Mr. [...],
  • [...],—Mr. M [...]ADY,
WOMEN.
  • Maud,—Mrs. HITCHCOCK,
  • [...],—Mrs. R [...]M [...]NZINI,
  • Mayoreſs,—Mrs. HANNAM,

PEEPING TOM.

[]

ACT I.

SCENE I. A view of Coventry.
Enter Count Lewis, Emma, and attendants.
Emma.

I CAN ſcarce believe I am ſafe, but where's that young peaſant that reſcued me?

Lewis.

That young fellow behaved very well, he did indeed, my, lovely Emma, but you are ſafe now, I give you joy.

Emma.

Give me joy, no, that you never ſhall;—

Lewis.

Now you are angry, but when we are married—

Emma.

You and I married, that we never ſhall.

Lewis.

Oh [...] that will be fine indeed, to be [...] from Normandy, your father the earl of M [...]cia ſays, you Count Lewis, ſhall wed my daughter Emma—But the enemy of all ſport, a wicked Dane, darted like a [] ravenous falcon on you, my pretty little dove, and becauſe I would not fight, you will not marry me—now if I did, I might be killed, and would not be married.

Emma.

To run away, and not even draw your ſword.

Lewis.

It is ill manners to draw—in the preſence of the ladies.

Emma.

To be ſure you're a gallant champion for the ladies!

Lewis.

I love the ladies, and love myſelf,—for the ladies ſake—beſides the Danes are a barbarous enemy, and I made a vow never to encounter a Dane.

Emma.

Here comes my benefactor and deliverer.

Enter Harold.
Harold.

Madam— I've chaſtiſed the villains that have dared to inſult you, but hope you've received no hurt!

Emma.

Thanks to your kindneſs—but what is your name?

Har.

William, madam.—

Emma.

William—while I am here in Coventry, this token will remind you who it is you have oblig'd

gives a ring.
Lew.

And young man, if you were a a little more poliſhed, I would prefer you to be ſquire, to my lady wife here.

Emma.

Your wife! never.

Exit Har.
Lewis

Never! Oh, I will go and tell your father—Oh! I—

Exit.
Emma.
[3]

No, nothing ſhall ever unite me to a creature ſo contemptible.

SONG.

Glittering trifler ſport of faſhion,
Gaudy inſect ever ranging;
For ſome other feign a paſſion,
Free me in thy fancy changing.
Love ne'er blooms where men are wanting,
Then how vain tyrannic power;
Is the ſoil unkind for planting.
Who can raiſe the blooming flower.
Self-enamoured ſwain all ſighing,
Gazing tender admiration;
In our eyes their image eying,
There they pay their adoration.
True love I will believe you,
While you ove yourſelf ſo dearly,
If I hate I don't deceive you,
Yet I fear I love ſincerely.
Exit Emma and attendants.
SCENE, the Street.
Enter Harold.
Har.

Charming Emma! when ſhe knows me to be Harold, the ſon of Earl Goodwin, her father's proſeſſed enemy, my blooming hopes are blaſted in the birth.

Enter Tom and Mob.
Tom.

Is any body here? Joy! joy! huzza!

Har.
[4]

For what?

Tom.

Becauſe Earl Goodwin and his ſons are baniſhed.

Har.

My father, myſelf and my brother baniſhe dmdash;

(aſide.)
Tom.

Huzza! biſhop Dunſtan has commanded king Edward, to command the earl, to command the mayor, to command me, to make proclamation at the croſs, that the earl Goodwin and his ſons, are traitors in the land.mdash;And I am now going to do the jobmdash;come along good-folks, God bleſs the king, and the crier, knights, yeomen, young and old men, women and children—O yes!—0 yes!

Exit Tom and Mob.
Har.

Shall I venture into the town, if once Emma returns to her father's caſtle, probably I ſnall never ſee her again, ſhe is lodged here in the mayor's houſe, if I am known to be Harold, it is inſtant death, but life without my Emma is not worth my care.

SCENE, a Chamber.
Enter Mayor and Maud.
Maud.

Nay, now, don't, I told your worſhip—you know, don't you believe any ſuch thing—Lord, what will the folks ſay, to ſee his honour the mayor of Coventry, make ſo free with Tom the taylor's wife?

Mayor.

Let me hear them talk, and I'll ſet them in. the ſtocks—Zounds, dare [5] they cenſure a magiſtrate—Let me ſee them wink and there's the ducking-ſtool—for a nod, the cage—for an inuendo, the pillory—and for a malicious whiſper five hundred twirls in the whirligig.

Maud.

You know, your worſhip, I was vartuous—you know I was forced to leave madam, your wife's ſervice, becauſe I would not let you—you know I would not be naught with you, and ſooner than do ſo—I was forced to take up with Tom, who but a taylor, was honeſt!

Mayor.

Ay! Tom's a rogue!

Maud.

A rogue, and like your worſhip!—why he's a bit of a magiſtrate—was not he a pariſh clerk, beadle and ſexton at one time, and is he not now overſeer and church-warden?

Mayor.

Ay, but who made him all this?—was he no better than a clown, till I took him under my wing?

Maud.

He's certainly a little beholden to your worſhip.

Mayor.

Ah ! he owes it all to your pretty face Maud—it was all for your ſake, in your beauty—for you have proviſions of all forts—why you have got a beadle in that arched dimple—a conſtable's ſtaff in that pretty mole—an overſeer in that hazle-eye—a church-warden in thoſe auburn-locks— and a pair of plump aldermen in that panting boſom—

Maud.
[6]

Oh lord, I did not think I was ſuch a great body.

Mayor.

Yes, you are, indeed you are—talk of Godiva the earl's new-married lady, and his daughter Emma—why I will wager that ſmile, againſt the whole kingdom of Mercia—egad, if thoſe ſtars were to twinkle in the court of Gloſter, king Edward would ſoon forget his vow of chaſtity.

SONG.

Mayor. Maud.
The deuce a one but you, pretty Maud,
I love, indeed 'tis true, pretty Maud,
One kiſs, nay prithee huſh
Md.
I vow you make me bluſh;
May.
Like a roſe bud in a buſh, pretty Maud.
Md.
Do let me go away, Mr. Mayor,
What will the people ſay, Mr. Mayor.
May.
Let them prattle as they will,
Of love I'll have my fill,
Like a dove I'll coo and bill;
Md.
You ſhall not coo and bill Mr. Mayor.
May.
Pretty Maud, pretty Maud.
By all that's great and grand, pretty Maud;
Golden chain, and lilly wand, pretty Maud.
Md
'Tis all of little uſe
Chain and wand I must refuſe
For the needle, thimble, gooſe
Mr. Mayor, Mr. Mayor
Maud.

I tell you what now, Mr. Mayor, you ſhall not talk to me in that way any more, that's what you ſhall not.

Mayor.
[7]

But I will—I will tell you what—I will call on you by and by—do not be out—I know Tom will be ringing his bells.

Maud.

Lord, your honor, if your lady ſhould know.

Mayor.

My lady, poh! poh! ſhe's at home, God bleſs her, let her ſtay there.

Maud.

Ay, but then the neighbours.—

Mayor.

Neighbours!—the pillory—the ſtocks—the whirligig.— I'll tell you Maud, I'll ſend you a preſent of ſome French wine, that I had from count Lewis, and Egad we'll be ſo ſnug and ſo comfortable; you go home and I'll be with you by and by.

Tom
[liſtening.]

My wife will be a mayor ſoon and I ſhall be an alderman.

[Maud Exit.]
Enter Tom.
Mayor.

I'll ſend you the wine, and there's ſomething to buy a bit of dinner. (gives Tom money)

Tom.

I'm obliged to your worſhip.

Mayor.

(ſurpriſed at ſeeing Tom inſtead of Maud) Tom, ay, ay, how do you do Tom, how do you do, how do you do ?

Tom.

Pretty well I thank your worſhip;— but ſir, is this for a corporation dinner?

Mayor.

No, no, (what the devil brings this felllow here, aſide.) Pray have you not a ringing to day, at the Guy of Warwick, Tom.

Tom.

Oh yes, we jingle a peal of tripple-bobs, for a leg of mutton and trimmings.

Mayor.
[8]

(Egad that's very lucky, I ſhall have Maud all to myſelf.) Tom you are a good ringer.

Tom.

Pretty well, ſir.

Mayor.

Yes, you are Tom, you are, you will certainly win. Mind your bells, Tom—do not neglect going, you'll certainly win Tom.—But what brought you to me now Tom?

Tom.

Tho' merry I be, I never was ſo treated in my whole life, why you know our old mad Crazy, the beadle, I thought he might make ſome blunder in proclaiming, the proclamation of earl Goodwin and his ſons, as traitors, ſo I took the bell and rung the people all about me, and there I ſtood like a hen and chickens, but I no ſooner cried ' O Yes, O Yes' than I heard a voice like a gander in the marſhes, ſcreaming out' O No, O No' and who ſhould this be but old Crazy, for I having got the city bell, he hobbled with the 'pothecary's peſtle and mortar, and clattered with ſuch a devil of a noiſe, folks could not hear, and becauſe I told him to be quiet, he flew at me and tripped up the leg of old corporal Standfaſt, tumbled over Kit the tinker, overturned father Fogarty, the fat fryar, and has mauled my noſe in this manner—look—he fit for an office, indeed, an old driveller.

Mayor.

Why, you moſt impudent of all raſcals, who am I?

Tom.
[9]

Why, ſir, you are the Mayor of Coventry.

Mayor.

And did not I appoint him beadle?

Tom.

Why, lord, he's ſo infirm, that when he ſtands at church-door with the poor's box, his hand ſhakes ſo, that the gentle folks charity-farthings fall out of the box—why, he has not one of his twelve ſenſes left but his ſcratching.

Mayor.

Sirrah, he has all his talents about him,—he's been a deviliſh ſhrewd fellow.

Tom.

Yes, he's a man of ſharp talons as my noſe can teſtify.

Mayor.

Oh! here he comes.

Enter Crazy.
Crazy.

You a mayor—there's a fig for your crown and ſceptre.

Tom.

There your worſhip, the fellow has made a king of you.

Crazy.

Tell me of kings—I that have ſeen Edward the martyr—the glorious Alfred and Canute the great!

Tom.

Yes, but did Canute the great give you authority to ſcratch my noſe?

Crazy.

I'll Canute you—I that have been beadle here ever ſince the days of Edmond Ironſide.

Mayor.

Ay, and a deviliſh clever fellow he was.

Crazy.

What do you mean?

Tom.
[10]

I mean that you are curſedly ſhabby about the noddle,—you have lived a great while.

Mayor.

Come, be quiet Tom—here I command you to read the proclamation—now ſhew him that you can proclaim it right;—mind, in king Edward's name, you are to offer a reward of five hundred marks, to any man that will bring in Goodwin, earl of Warwick, dead or alive.

Crazy.

Yes I will—This is to give notice, that by command of Earl Goodwin, king Edward ſhall have five hundred marks for bringing in the head of the mayor of Coventry, dead or alive.

Tom.

That ſenſible fellow has made a pretty proclamation!

Crazy.

Now, ain't I an old chaunter?

Mayor.

Yes—I'll truſt you with the public affairs, but you ſhall have nothing to do with mine.

Tom.

So—between the magiſtrate and his deputy, the affairs of the public are likely to fare well—he has not ſenſe enough to help you in your love affairs with the girls, as he uſed to do.

Mayor.

I'll try him

(aſide)

can't you contrive to keep Tom from going home?

Crazy.

What! you are going to Maud?— well, I will, I will.

Mayor.

Mind your bells Tom—Tom—mind your bells.

Tom.
[11]

I will:

SONG.

Tom.
Merry are the bells,
And merry do they ring,
Crazy.
Merry was myſelf,—
And merry cou'd I ſing;
Chorus.
Merry is your ding-dong, happy, gay and free,
Merry with a ſing ſong, merry let us be.
Mayor.
Waddle goes your gait,
Tom.
Hollow are your hoes;
Mayor.
Noddle goes your pate,
Tom.
And purple is your noſe.
Chorus.
Merry is pur ding-dong, happy, gay and free,
And with a merry ſing-ſong, merry let us be.
Exeunt,
SCENE changes to Tom's Houſe.
Enter Maud.
Maud

There never was a young woman ſo beſet as I am by his worſhip—if I tell Tom, there's a quarrel—and then there's no ſtaying for us in Coventry, the mayor has ſuch a power of intereſt—I've a great mind to tell madam, his lady, now I will be quit with him one way or other, for his bad opinion of me, that I will; when people get up a little in the world—Lord, they think there's nothing but to uſe poor folks as they pleaſe [12] —hang the town—how is my Tom altered ſince I came into it,

SONG.

Maud.
What pleaſure to think of the times we have ſeen,
Twas May-day I firſt ſaw my Tom on the green,
So neat was I dreſt, and ſo ſprightly a mein,
A king was my love, and I was his queen.—
The garland preſented by Tommy,
From the hands of my Tommy.
A ſide look I ſtole at my lover by chance,
Which ſtraight he return'd with ſo tender a glance;
My heart leap'd with joy when I ſaw him advance,
And well did I gueſs 'twas to lead off the dance.
For none danc'd ſo neat as my Tommy
In all things compleat was my Tommy.

Oh! here comes the wicked mayor.

Enter Mayor, two countrymen and Hamper.
Mayor.

Now, here, bring the hamper this way—bring it along—make haſte—there now, get along with you.

drives the two men out.
Maud.

What ſhall I do ?

Mayor.

Come along—come—there get along—now to bolt the door,

faſtens the door.
Maud.

I'm undone, no creature in the houſe but myſelf—he muſt not know that or he may be unmodeſt indeed,

(aſide.)
Mayor.

Egad here I am Maud, and Tom is abroad with the ringers practiſing his bells [13] —here am I—but you little rogue, how nicely you gave me the flip juſt now!

Maud.

I aſk your pardon, but you know I muſt obey my huſband—why would you bring me all this wine?

Mayor.

All under the roſe; you ſhall treat me with a glaſs; it will make your veins thrill, your cheeks glow, your boſom pant, your heart beat, your eyes ſparkle with love and rapture.

Maud.

Lord, ſir, will wine bewitch a body ſo?

Mayor.

Yes, it will, do you know that Love has ſummoned you before me, as a witch, and by the virtue of my authority, I commit you to thoſe arms!

Maud.

O! ſure your worſhip's a little mad-diſh!

Maud.

I am at this time as mad a magiſtrate as ever devoured a haunch of veniſon.

Maud.

Nay, now do not talk that way to me, now, do not now,

(a great knocking at the door.)
Tom.
(from without)

Maud, Maud, why have you bolted the door?

Maud.

That's my Tom!

Mayor.

Where ſhall I go?

Maud.

Oh, lord, if he ſees you?

Mayor.

I'll go up ſtairs.

Maud.

You muſt not, indeed, he will go up there!

Mayor.
[14]

What ſhall I do? oh my dear reputation, hide me, hide me, ſome where.

Maud.

Suppoſe you hide in this hamper that brought the wine ?

Mayor.

Oh, excellent! right woman, for invention, ſaith,

(gets into the hamper.)
Tom ſtill making a noiſe at the door.

Why don't you open the door, Maud?

Maud.

I'm coming, I'm coming, Tom.

Tom
puſhes open the door.

Why the deuce did you bolt the door Maud, now I've broke the bolt.

Maud.

Becauſe I was alone, and one can't tell what might happen to a body—but what brought you home, Tom?

Tom.

Why grand news!

Maud.

News!

Tom.

Yes, there is his lorſhip, the earl of Mercia, coming to our town—and there is the wedding liveries to be finiſhed—and you are to pay your honours to the bride before ſhe leaves the mayor's houſe, and goes back to the caſtle—I have won the wager Maud, at the Guy of Warwick.

Maud.

Have you?

Tom.

I have won it, tol de rol—I'm come home half fuddled with joy—I'll now go and ſee how the cloaths go on—what hamper's that Maud?

Maud.

Oh that!—aye, that's a hamper of wine that the Mayor deſires you to ſee left ſafe at home, and deliver'd to madam his lady.

Tom.
[15]

Wine!—Oh! I'll carry it immediately, as I'm an Officer ſhould do the Mayor's buſineſs.

Maud.

So you ſhould Tom—for the Mayor is willing enough to do your buſineſs.

Tom.

I'll ſee the hamper deliver'd to none but his lady.

Maud.
(aſide)

Egad, you'll trim his worſhip neatly.

Tom.

You are a happy wife to have ſo clever a huſband as I am— ſuch a rare huſband, Maud !

Maud.

And you have a rare wife of me, if you knew but all— Lord ! what gcod ſpirits you're come home in Tom.

Tom.

How loving good cheer makes a body,

Song.

Tom.
Egad we had a glorious feaſt
So good in kind ſo nicely dreſt
Our liquor too was of the beſt—I'll tell ye
One leg of mutton, two ſat geeſe
With beans and bacon, ducks and peaſe
In ſhort we [...]d every thing to pleaſe—the belly
The clock ſtruck twelve in merry chime
The prieſt ſaid grace in Saxon rhime
Says I to me this is no time—for playing
The room was full when I came in
But ſoon I napkin'd up my chin
With knife and ſork I now begin—to lay in
[16]
The curate who at ſuch a rate,
Of dues and tythe pigs us'd to prate,
In ſilence ſat behind his plate—a peeping.
Moſt churchmen like the vicar too
A Shepherd to his flock below,
Like any wolf good mutton now—was deep in.
We nodded health for no one ſpoke,
The cloth roll'd off we crack'd a joke,
And drink the king, and ſing and ſmoke—tobacco.
Our reck'ning out, they call a whip.
I ſteals my h [...] and home I trip,
My pretty Maud your velvet lip—to ſmack-o.
Exeunt
SCENE, The Mayor's Houſe.
Emma aſleep.[Enter Harold]
Har.

The people of this town are all running after news—Mobs and Proclamations—it is bold of me to venture here even into the Mayor's houſe, and a price ſet upon my head by command of the earl—Cruel fate! but I will ſee Emma again, 'tho at the riſk of my life—Ah! what, my lovely Emma ſleeping—ſweet emblem of innocence.

Enter Tom with the Hamper.
Tom.

There—leave the hamper of wine 'till I find out madam the Mayoreſs—where the plague are all the ſervants, Oh dear! ah! ah! there is young lady Emma taking a nap after dinner—egad theſe great folks eat ſo heartily of ſo many diſhes—ſhe looks ſo roſy and for all the world like a pretty picture [17] —what a charming landſcape—I fancy your great ladies never ſnore— even Maud does not ſnore much—perhaps ſhe's dreaming—I dreamt once, I ſhould be exalted above the whole town, by the means of a great lady—may be this is my lucky minute; what if I—Oh dear, I have a great mind—Egad I will give her a kiſs—I will

[Harold advances and draws his ſword, Tom falls on his knees]

I'm dead.

Har.

Tom, you are the only perſon that has ſeen me enter here, betray me and here is inſtant death—aſſiſt me, and here is the means of living well.

[Shews a purſe.]
Tom.

Sir, I always love to live well, becauſe—becauſe—I am a good chriſtian.

Har.

Take your choice, gold or ſteel.

Tom.

Gold is a pretty thing, I am out of conceit with ſteel, ſince laſt Monday, when I run the needle into my thumb.

Har.

When ſhe wakes give her this ring, and if ſhe queſtions tell her the owner's at hand.

Retires,
Tom.

Yes Sir, I'll tell her its in the owners hands.

Har.

From thence I may form ſome idea of my ſucceſs.

Tom.

Madam, a handſome gentleman, an ill-looking robber, with great civility— a ſword to my throat—ſaid, Sir be ſo good, to ſhew that lady this ring—you villain—you dog—give her this.

Emma.
[18]

That ring I gave to my benefactor, my dear my generous William.

[Harold appearing]

Heavens! what do I hear?

Tom
(going off and peeping)

Oh, ho! well I will go and carry the hamper to the Mayoreſs— Oh, ho!—I ſuppoſe ſo—oh well—what's that to Tom?—Aye, oh, aye!—oh, ho!—oh, ho!

Exit Tom.
Har.

Madam, if I am ſo happy as to hold, a place in your affections, whilſt I acknowledge your condeſcenſion, permit me to ſay, it reflects no diſhonour on your choice, for in poor William the peaſant, you behold Harold, ſon to Goodwin, earl of Kent, and happy only in being hated by the father of her he loves.

Emma.

Is it poſſible, are you Harold, for whoſe life the proclamation is out? Oh heavens! if you are diſcovered you are loſt, and I miſerable,

Har.

Charming Emma, that tender anxiety for my ſafety, rewards a life of exile; but this evening is appointed for the celebration or your nuptials with the Count—This moment the equipage is on the road to convey you away to the caſtle.

Emma.

Oh Heavens! doomed to a wretch I deſpiſe.

Har.

Truſt to my honor madam, and I will inſtantly convey you to my father's court; thus you will avert the impending ſtorm, and there in ſafety you may determine the fate of him who adores you.

Emma.
[19]

It would be ungrateful to diſtruſt your ſincerity—I reſign myſelf entirely to your protection—free me from this odious match with count Lewis, and it will be a favour I ſhall ever acknowledge—and eſteem as a generous obligation.

Exeunt.
Scene, A Room in the Mayor's houſe.
Enter Tom with the Hamper.
Tom.

Yes, that poor fellow muſt be ſome rich man from the money he gave me—there is love—0 yes, there is certainly love in the caſe—well, what's that to Tom?—my buſineſs is to deliver this wine to the Mayoreſs, I am in great favour—ſhe ſmiles upon me whenever ſhe ſees me,—now if ſhe ſhould be the great lady who is to exalt me—who knows, here comes the Mayoreſs herſelf.

Enter Mayoreſs.
Mayoreſs.

Not a ſervant in this houſe, all gone I ſuppoſe to ſee the young lady, Godiva come into town—Oh ! good Tom.

Tom.
(aſide)

She always calls me good Tom, that's no bad ſign.

Mayoreſs.

What's this Tom?

Tom.

Madam, when I went home, I found my door locked, and burſting it open, my wife Maud got this hamper in care, which [20] his worſhip the Mayor had told her—to tell me, to fetch it to your ladyſhip.

Mayoreſs

More nonſenſe of my blockhead of a huſband.

Tom

It's no nonſenſe madam, becauſe it's wine.

Mayoreſs

Oh, wine I ſuppoſe that he has purchaſed from the French Count.

Tom

It's no purchaſe, it's a preſent.

Mayoreſs

[...] a preſent from the French Count I ſuppoſe—Well for this trouble Tom you ſhall have the firſt glaſs.

Tom

I long to drink your ladyſhip's health—you are the tulip of Coventry.

Mayoreſs

You have a good taſte Tom.

Tom

Taſte, Madam, I could drink a bottle when you are the toaſt;

Enter Maud.
Maud

Ay, and you will have a bottle well filled preſently.

Mayoreſs

What brings you here?

Maud

I come to empty the hamper, madam.

Mayoreſs

You.

Maud

Yes madam for it was laſt filled at my houſe.

Tom

So Maud you was toping, when you locked yourſelf in.

(opens the hamper and diſcovers the Mayor)

There madam!

Mayoreſs

My huſband!

Tom

Egad, this is indeed a big-bellied bottle!

Mayoreſs
[21]

What—you have been at your old tricks I ſuppoſe.

Tom

Well done Maud—Egad you have hamper'd his worſhip.

Mayoreſs

You are a right worſhipful magiſtrate.

Mayor
(comes out of the hamper)

So I am wife—Tom, remember I am the father of you all.

Tom

Yes! and you want to be father of my children.

Mayor

Come here wife—come here—well Tom, as this was only a frolic you'll ſend home the wine.

Tom

Oh, is it at home now?

Mayor

Yes, but you'll ſend it home to me.

Tom

Oh no—the devil a drop you get—I'll keep it to drink to my wife's virtue, and the like ſucceſs to your worſhip's intrigues.

Mayor

Dear wife, forgive this.

FINALE.

Maud
Who would deſtroy domeſtic joy,
Be ever ſham'd like you Sir,
Then girls agree to do like me,
Out with each fly ſeducer.
The deuce may mend and ſhame attend,
Who thus with ſupple temper,
Then Maſter Mayor pray have a care,
Nor again get into a hamper.
Tom.
Well pleaſed to find my wife ſo kind.
So cunning and ſo clever,
The bells ſhall ring, her praiſe I'll ſing,
For ever, and for ever. The bells &c.
END OF ACT I.

ACT II

[22]
SCENE The Street.
Enter Tom, followed by a Mob.
Tom.

HUZZA! huzza! neighbours, neighbours, where are you all going?

Mob.

Huzza!—to meet the earl of Mercia, and lady Godiva!

Tom.

Why, neighbours, what will they think of our town—let us welcome them in order—if we muſt roar, let us roar like men and chriſtians—I'll chear them with a choice chaunt—and then I'll make a fine ſpeech,— and then when I'm making the ſpeech—not a grunt from one of you—not a grunt!

Mob.

Why, what will you ſay?

Tom.

Why, ſuppoſe now, you to be the counteſs—I deſire you to make a low courtſey to me, becauſe you are very civil—now you frown with your under lip more—now curl up your noſe—ſo now Mr. Counteſs take your fingers out of your mouth—do, now ſettle your diamond necklace—ſhew your fine ring and white hand.—

Mob.
[23]

But Mr. Tom, as I have got no diamond necklace, won't it do as well to ſtroke my beard ?

Tom.

No, no it won't—did you ever hear of a counteſs ſtroking her beard?—now I will make a ſpcech—"May it pleaſe your lordſhip and your ladyſhip—the great honor you have done us, in coming to our beggarly town;"

Mob.

What—Coventry a beggarly town?—why you deſerve a kicking!

Tom.

Now, did you ever know a counteſs to kick a church-warden?

Enter Mayor.
Mob

No ſpeech, no ſpeech—a ſpeech from the mayor, to be ſure.

Tom

The mayor's an ignorant man!

Mayor

What's the matter here?

Mob

Here's Tom abuſing the whole town.

Mayor

Is he?—get you gone all of you— Tom, you are a very impudent fellow—ſo Tom, I'm an ignorant man.

Tom

Are you, ſir?

Mayor

And you are an impudent raſcal;

Tom

My impudence, and having a wiſe too pretty for me, and too virtuous for your worſhip.

[24]

SONG.

Tom.
Your Worſhip your wings may clap,
And think yourſelf a great city cock,
You'll never my Maud entrap,
For ſhe is the hen of a pretty cock.
Your worſhip, &c.
Have done with your winks and your leers,
For Tom is a taylor that's knowing ſir;
He'll trim you himſelf with his ſheers,
And then you'll have done with your crowing ſir.
Your worſhip, &c.
My wife is a white-legged fowl,
Can bill like a thruſh or dove in tree;
But never will pair with an owl,
My worſhipful mayor of Coventry.
Your worſhip, &c.
Mayor

Tom, I diſcharge you from all public offices—the public good demands it.

Tom

The public good-why—can you forget when you collected the poor's-rate, you lent out the money at three pence a week for a ſhilling—and when church-warden, you was detected in putting in ſix-pence and taking out half-a-crown

Mayor

I put in half-a-crown.

Tom

Ay, that was compound.

Mayor

Tom, I diſcharge you down to a common conſtable.

Crazy

He is no conſtable, that office belongs to me!

Mayor.

Tom, I ſupercede you—I muſt be ready to receive the earl of Mercia.

[25] Enter the Earl of Mercia, Godiva, and attendants.
Earl

Mr. Mayor, my daughter has made a long viſit at your houſe.

Mayor.

She does my houſe, my lord much honor.

Lady God.

Has not your fair at Coventry laſted much longer than uſual?

Mayor

My lady, in order to compenſate for the great honor done us, we have had a greater variety of entertainments than ever was known in Coventry!

Tom

We have indeed had great diverſions my lady; lord, how beautiful ſhe is!

Crazy

Yes, we have had much merrymaking.

Earl

Who are you, my old friend?

Crazy

Pleaſe your worſhip—I'm mayor of Coventry.

Mayor

The devil you are.

Tom

Pleaſe your worſhip, that old gentleman's wits are a little out at the elbows, and tho'my brain is quite new, and I've been ſo active in every office, yet the mayor has put him over my head—and he's mad.

Mayor

Crazy there has merit.

Tom.

I've done nothing.

Earl

So then you are the active officer that has done nothing!

Crazy.

I do all myſelf!

Earl
[26]

This ſame town of Coventry ſeems to be well-governed—if one may judge by the appearance of its magiſtrates.

Tom

His lordſhip ſeems to be in a plaguy ill-humour—he looks dam'd glum—come— clear up your pipes and give him a ſong.

SONG.

Tom.
Your lordſhip's welcome among us,
Becauſe you are the peer;
Your ladyſhip never will wrong us,
Becauſe you're not ſevere.
Chorus.
This is joyful news,
What citizen will refuſe.
To ſtick up their houſes with holly?
We'll broach a tub of humming bub,
To welcome home with a rub-a-dub-dub,
So neighbours let's all be jolly.
Mayor.
At our fair you'll be delighted,
The bells ſhall ring merrily,
And when my lord, I'm knighted,
Sir Gregory Gooſe, I'll be.
Chorus.
Enter Count Lewis.
Count

Emma, my lord, your daughter's fled—gone off—and accompanied by a young peaſant—that I dare ſay muſt be the peaſant that reſcued her from the Danes; it [27] ſeems Harold, earl Goodwin's ſon has been lurking about the town.

Earl
(looking on the mayor)

Is this your fidelity to me—ſince you have joined in the treaſon, all partake in the puniſhment—for this offence I amerce your city in a thouſand marks, and by Heavens, the power of man ſhall not induce me to abate one ſcruple—ſee that this is complied with in an hours notice, or rigour ſhall enforce my ſentence.

Exit Earl and attendants.
Tom

Here's a pretty job!

Crazy

I remember Alfred the great laid a tax upon horn combs.

Enter Mayoreſs.
Mayoreſs

Fine care you have taken of us!

Mayor

Fire, ſword and famine is come upon Us!—O grief—O ruin!

Tom

You ſee when my lord takes a thing in his head, he ſays I will do it—and in that caſe he ſurely does it—and then it's done.

Mayoreſs

We all know that lady Godiva is as ſweet-temper'd as her huſband is crabbed and cruſty—now I will ſummon all the good-wives in a body and I will go at their head, and with diſhevelled hair and ſtreamin'g eyes, will beſeech the lady, to beſeech her huſband—to take off the tax.

Tom.

An excellent thought!

Mayor

I muſt get the conſent of the corporation—I will go ſummon the livery—

Mayoreſs
[28]

Summon the Livery, you had better go ſummon the petticoats—

Tom.

I'm for the petticoats.

Crazy

And I love the petticoats.

Exeunt
SCENE a Street.
Enter Emma and Harold.
Emma.

What a dilemma?

Har.

The city guard being poſted prevented our eſcape—

Emma.

When my father knows you are the perſon that aſſiſted my eſcape, he will be in ſuch a rage—

Har.

A ſeparation from my Emma, alone is a terror for her faithful Harold.

Emma.

Was my father but to conſider your valour, he would certainly be reconciled.

Har.

True, my love, I have bled in my country's cauſe, and ſhall again—not the fire of love, nor the froſt of age, ſhall check my ſpirit in the cauſe of Britain.

Emma.

Oh, do not have an idea of ſeparation; if you could but find a place of ſafety here for the preſent—I think this is the houſe of poor honeſt Tom, the taylor, I have ſeen ſo often at the Mayor's.

[29] Enter Tom.
Tom.

Ay, they there go—what a fine ſtring of them, I did not think there were ſo many women in Coventry, at leaſt not ſo many pretty girls in it—I love the pretty girls becauſe they are generally ſo handſome— they always ſnigger at me as they paſs, how can they help it, when I caſt ſuch fly looks at them—there they all march in a body—egad it's a delicate body and the Mayoreſs at their head, ſhe's a fine head—well if this ſcheme ſucceeds, I will get drunk tonight like a ſober citizen, and drink ſucceſs to the petticoat corporation—Oh lord, madam Emma, there they are gone up to the lady Godiva.

Emma.

You'll not betray me!

Har.

Mind Tom, money or ſteel.

Tom.

No, Sir, I have enough of gold and keep the ſword to defend the lady,—you will find ſhelter in my houſe, perhaps as good as in a rich man's—for lord, I am as great a friend to love as the women's favourite the fat fryar father Fogarty.

SONG.

When I was a younker and liv'd with my Dad,
The neighbour's all thought me a ſmart little lad,
My mammy ſhe call d me a white headed boy,
Becauſe with the girls I lik'd for to toy.
There was Ciſs, Priſs, Letty, and Betty and Doll,
With Meg, Peg, Jenny and Winny and Moll,
I flatter their chaiter ſo ſprightly and gay,
I rumble 'em, tumble 'em that's my way.
[30]
One fine froſty morning a going to ſchool,
Young Moggy I met and ſhe called me a fool,
Her mouth as my primmer a leſſon I took,
I ſwore it was pretty and kiſs'd the book;
But ſchool, fool, primmer, and trimmer and birch,
And boys for the girls I have left in the lurch.
I flatter &c
Tis very well known I can dance a good jig,
And at cudgels from Robin I won a fat Pig,
I wreſtle a fall, and a bar I can ſling,
And when o'er a flaggon moſt ſweetly can ſing.
But Pig, jig, wicket, and cricket and ball
I'd give up to wreſtle with Moggy of all,
I flatter &c.
Exit.
Scene a chamber in Tom's houſe.
Enter Tom.
Tom.

I have a great fancy to know what Maud and the Mayoreſs have done—Lord, how I long to know what ſucceſs they have had, or whether they will forgive the tax—oh, there's Maud come back, I hear her voice.

Maud.
(without)

Oh, madam, I'll only tell my Tom.

(entering)

Oh, Tom, here we have got the young lady Emma in the houſe—have you ſeen the counteſs?

Tom.

I know what we have got—but tell me, ſhall we get the tax off, you all went, and were you all there?

Maud.

Yes, there we went, and we were all admitted to lady Godiva's preſence!

Tom.
[]

Oh, God that was pleaſant.

Maud.

So it was Tom—we all fell a crying.

Tom.

How did you manage that, Maud—I never ſaw you cry in all my life.

Maud.

I only made believe—then we all fell on our knees, then we got up again.

Tom.

Yes, yes, Oh, I ſee—I ſee you did!

Maud.

Then the Counteſs ſhe heard our petitions, and ſhe aſked my lord to pardon the city—no, ſaid his lordſhip that I will not—I have ſworn that the power of man ſhall not perſuade me—Yes, but ſays ſhe, the power of woman may, and I am a woman, ſays ſhe.

Tom.

Oh, ſhe need not have told him that.

Maud.

And ſays her ladyſhip, I am a good woman and your wife; and you as a good huſband ought to do as I bid you.

Tom.

She was a little out there.

Maud.

Says the earl as you are a good woman, I will forgive the tax, only on one condition—what's that ſays my lady? It is, ſays he, only if you will ride through the city of Coventry naked, without a rag of cloaths on.

Tom.

What!

Maud.

Now, he only joked; having no notion ſhe would do it—but ſhe having the good of our city at heart took him at his word, and is actually now preparing for it.

Tom.
[32]

Lady Godiva, ride a horſe-back—all through the city, without any—well if I ever—

Maud.

Now you are all agog, with you nonſenſical curioſity.

Tom.

I have? no curioſity.

Maud.

Tom, Tom, our fortune is made, for as the lady Emma has taken ſhelter in our houſe—

Tom.

O u houſe— ride—ſo, ſo—

Maud.

But here's a young peaſant in her company.

Tom.

Company; then I ſuppoſe ſhe will have nothing, at all—

Maud.

Tis very odd, for he ſeems to have a fight of money.

Tom.

Sight of money—ſuch a ſight.

Maud.

Hang the man is he grown ſtupid—what are you thinking of Tom?

Tom.

I was thinking of a ſide-ſaddie.

Maud.

Was there ever ſuch a fool, but I muſt go and attend lady Emma, ſo I will leave you to ride on your ſide-ſaddle.

Exit.
Tom.

Talk of a coronation, 'tis no more to this—Lady Godiva is a proceſſion in herſelf, I muſt go in time to procure a good place—ſhall I aſk our Maud to go—no, no, the ſight would be loſt, upon Maud—but I'll go—

Enter the Mayor.
Tom.

What brings you here, Sir.

Mayor.
[33]

Well Tom, I ſuppoſe you have heard?

Tom.

Yes Sir.

Mayor.

Lady Godiva, in her progreſs thro' the city, paſſes by your houſe here.

Tom.

Gad Sir, that's lucky, I ſhall have an opportunity of ſeeing her nicely.

Mayor.

Yes, and you will have an opportunity of hanging in hemp nicely at your own door—the ſtreets are to be cleared—all the windows and the houſes to be faſtened up, no perſon to be ſeen on pain of death, of the male kind.

Tom.

Me—do you think I would look, ſir,—I wiſh I could get him out of my houſe— why what need your worſhip be in a hurry to go.

Mayor.

I am in a hurry to go Tom.

Tom.

It's a fine day abroad, Sir.

Mayor.

But every body muſt ſtay at home.

Tom.

Well if you will go home you muſt—good-bye, to you, Sir.

Mayor.

What are you going Tom?

Tom.

Yes, Sir; I wiſh you a good-bye, Sir, I will not ſtay in this room, while lady Godiva paſſes it commands ſuch a proſpect.

Mayor.

Gad that's true, from that window I could have a charming peep, if that fellow was but out of the way.

aſide.
Tom.

I'll go down, and lock myſelf in the cellar to avoid temptation.

Mayor
[34]

Do Tom—that's a good boy, and I'll go home, Tom!

Tom

Good-bye to you, Sir.

Mayor

Good-bye to you, Tom.

Tom

So you are going home, Sir?

Mayor

Yes, I'm going home, now do you go and lock yourſelf up in the cellar.

Tom

Yes, I will Sir, good-bye, Sir

Mayor

Good-bye, Tom!

Tom

Good-bye, Sir.

Mayor.

Good-bye, Tom!

Exeunt ſeverally.
Re-enter Mayor. Bell tolls.
Mayor.

By this time, lady Godiva's paſt the croſs, all is clear, and fooliſh Tom has locked himſelf up in the cellar, and thinks I am gone home—She cannot be far off now—I ſhall have a charming peep at her from that window—I'll go and look for ſomething to put on this table.

Exit.
Enter Tom.
Tom

So by this time his worſhip's at home, curſt troubleſome old hound, and lady Godiva muſt be at hand—I think. I hear her horſe's feet—the clinking of their hoofs is far ſweeter than a haut-boy.

(Drags a ſtool and puts it on the table, and gets up)

There there, ſhe's turning the corner.

[35] Enter Mayor.
Mayor

I can find, nothing—I'll. try to reach the window upon my tip-toes, tho' I break my neck for it—

(in ſtriving to get up he catches Tom in his arms)

Oh, you villain have I caught you peeping.

Tom

Sir, I was only going to take in the cock chaffinch.

Mayor

Come down, I'll have you hanged—I came here only on the look-out.

Exit.
Scene a Street.
Enter Tom, followed by the Earl, Mayoreſs, and attendants.
Earl

You ſhall be hanged Tom.

Tom

Then your lordſhp muſt get me another neck, for this is engaged already—

Earl

How, ſirrah! did you not know it was inſtant death!

Tom.

True, my lord, but I thought it was no harm.

Enter Maud.
Maud.

Oh, my dear, what's the matter, it is all along this wicked Mayor, he wants to make a widow of me—it would be for the public good if he was hanged, inſtead of my huſband—

Earl

Then we ſhould leave his wife here a ſorrowful widow.

Mayoreſs

Oh, my lord I ſhould not mind my private ſorrows for the public good—

Earl.
[36]

So then Mr. Mayor, all this was to forward your deſigns upon the young woman—if this culprit here will give up my daughter, his life ſhall be ſaved.

Tom

Then I have a dull chance, my lord; but my lord, tho'I am but a poor fellow, the richeſt jewel in your lordſhip's coronet could not make me betray a perſon, after once giving him the protection of my roof.

Earl

See him to execution—I will try him further.

Tom.

No mercy, my lord.

Earl

Yes, if you can produce Harold in your place, that may ſave your life.

Enter Harold and Emma.
Har.

Then ſave his life and take mine, I am Harold, but now the huſband of your unhappy daughter.

Earl.

Diſobedient child—of all men upon earth, is this your wretched choice?

Emma

My choice—my pride.

Earl

I would ſooner have beſtowed you on that peaſant, that reſcued you from the Danes, for his valour at loaſt has a claim upon my gratitude.

Emma

Then let Harold have that claim; he was that peaſant, the protector of my life and honour.

Earl

I ſee now that my prejudice to Earl Goodwin, has blinded me to his ſon's peculiar virtues, and what you have ſaved—take for your reward.

[37] Enter the Count.
Count

My lord, your daughter I claim acording to your promiſe.

Earl

No, he's unworthy of a lady's [...]e, that has not courage to protect it.

Tom

So here I ſtand all this while with the rope about my neck.

Mayor

I muſt do my duty, bring in the conſtables.

Earl

Tis your duty to reſign an office to which you are a diſgrace—Here I grant Tom a full pardon for his adherence to his word, and in your place I appoint him Mayor of Coventry.

Mayor

What Peeping Tom!

Tom

Hold your tongue, you dog, or I'll put you in the ſtocks.

Crazy

Whoever is Mayor, I'll be Church-Warden.

Earl

I believe I have been too ſevere upon your city, but ſince it has produced one honeſt man, I relinquiſh my claims.

Crazy

Yes, I'm an honeſt man, and you have found me out.

Tom

Then I hope our friends will be equally indulgent, and every man that loves a fine woman, will pardon, PEEPING TOM OF COVENTRY.

[38]

FINALE.

Harold.
Let ev'ry care and tumult ceaſe,
Bands of love unite us,
Kind friendſhip joy and laſting peace,
Ever ſhall delight us.
Maud.
I wiſh you joy of your diſgrace,
Let his wiſe alone, Sir;
For ſince by her you've loſt your place,
Better kiſs your own, Sir.
Mayor.
I've brought things to a pretty paſs,
By my own gallanting;
Tho'late a Mayor—I'm now an Aſs
This is my gala-ganting.
Crazy.
Why what a deuce is all this rout,
Ceaſe your idle ſinging,
Or by this hand I'll put you out,
And ſet the bells a ringing.
Tom.
Though you have as Poets ſee,
Rods in pickle ſteeping;
Forgive poor Tom of Coventry,
And pardon for his Peeping.
FINIS
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Citation Suggestion for this Object
TextGrid Repository (2020). TEI. 3404 Peeping Tom of Coventry A comic opera As it is performed at the Theatre Royal Smock Alley By John O Keefe Esq. University of Oxford Text Archive. . https://hdl.handle.net/21.T11991/0000-001A-59E8-B